Cat lived her life foot loose and fancy free
And the change in her life was, I’m afraid, down to me.
I felt she should grow up and leave wild living behind
I didn’t believe she would really, truly mind.
When Bunny decided he wanted an upgrade
To ears which were long and sharp as a blade,
I was left with spare ears (so soft and so pretty)
And I thought, ‘What could be better, let’s make a small kitty.
So, Cat suddenly found she was attached to a child –
Which may be a pussy or turn out quite wild.
She sighs and remembers nights on the tiles,
Roaming free in the moonlight for miles, miles and miles,
Of stalking the birds and soaking up sun,
Of being unburdened – of just being one.
I decided a spouse might make her life sweet.
He’d bring home the birdies, Koi Carp as a treat,
And kit-sit the nights she goes out with the gals
(So he’d feel less guilty ‘bout time spent with his pals).
But cat is still waiting for the right Tom.
None in the line-up have gone down a storm.
None of them live up to her high expectations.
None fill her with uncontrolable ellation.
If you know a Tom cat who’s handsome and free
And can tame a fe-line who is far too fuss-eee,
Send him along and I’ll make sure she’s not bitter
‘Cos I’ve threatened to increase her cat family litter!